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NONAH, NC. #003

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

rathercommon

Okay.

[ Damn it. ]

So what did you like about him?

$nastygram: (C:\onelinefix)$

From:

nastygram

His dick.

[So. More conversationally:]

Tell me what you heard us talking about.

From:

rathercommon

Oh, really. That was not a man who'd had sex with you.

$nastygram: (C:\beaniekey)$

From:

nastygram

[pls.]

Do you not sext in your cute poly relationship?

From:

rathercommon

[ A little disgruntled: ]

No. They'd probably freak out if I tried.

[ But that's beside the point - ]

I hope you're not saying he sent you a dick pic and you decided, oh, yes, marvelous courting technique, this is the man I'm going to have sex with. You're worth far more than a dick-pic seduction.

$nastygram: (C:\line666)$

From:

nastygram

[She huffs something almost like a laugh.]

Um, I'm sorry, are you slut shaming me or reading off of some girl power cue card.

From:

rathercommon

Girl power cue card?

[ Another noise of annoyance. ]

Honestly, have lots of sex, but do it with guys who are worth your time. And he was dull. Even if you're going to ditch him later, he ought to have something interesting to say. And that guy was mansplaining films to you.

[ And, getting back to earlier... ]

And I heard everything. From the very start.

Edited Date: 2016-09-13 02:45 am (UTC)

$nastygram: (C:\FOO?)$

From:

nastygram

[EQUALLY DISGUSTED by Kitty, Darlene makes a grossed out scoff.]

Oh my fucking god, please stop. I'm gonna ralph.

Not that I have to tell you this, because, trufacts, what I do is seriously none of your goddamn business? But I still totally know what I'm doing. It's a hookup. Please climb down out of the pro femme pulpit, okay? Not interested. Thank you.

From:

rathercommon

Rubbish!

[ She resists the urge to bite Darlene as she becomes more certain of this: ]

That's total rubbish. I've hooked up with dozens of guys - so there's one for your accusations that I'm slut-shaming you - and they never are like that. He was looking for a relationship. And you gave him a fake name, and you were doing something weird with those text messages...

[ A beat as she thinks - ]

Right. That's it, isn't it. You put something on his phone.

$nastygram: (C:\misbug)$

From:

nastygram

Wow. [Darlene looks up at the sky, either in another eyeroll, or maybe in a silent prayer for strength. Give me the power to accept dumb bitches who are acting as literal bugs atm.] Well, you got there eventually.

[A very oblique yes.]

Please be a normal person now.

From:

rathercommon

[ Tartly: ]

It would have taken me a lot less time to get there, and saved you a lot of time, if you hadn't lied to me so energetically. I don't want to be didactic, but you might take a lesson from that.

[ And, with absolutely no transformation from literal pest to figurative pest, she goes on: ]

What's it do? Get information? Who was he, that he'd have information that you'd want?

$nastygram: (C:\net.personality)$

From:

nastygram

Uh-uh, bitch.

[Hell no. Darlene stops dead. By now she has made her way to a cute sunny park. It's a weekday afternoon, so mostly the place is empty. Around the bend up ahead, a play structure rises into view. Rocketship themed.

Darlene narrows her eyes at its peak.]

You are changing back now or I'm taking a fucking Lysol bath.

From:

rathercommon

[ A pause, and then a very put-upon sigh. Then, about ten seconds later - enough time for a springy, hoppy, durable flea to descend right from Darlene's shoulder to the ground and bounce a few times - there's a flicker of magic at her feet, and a cat appears seemingly from nowhere. ]

There.

$nastygram: (C:\line666)$

From:

nastygram

[Okay, better, but. Still. Darlene narrows her eyes at the friggin cat.]

Okay, what the fuck is your deal. Are you a furry? BDD? What.

From:

rathercommon

[ Her ears flick in irritation, and her tail lashes. And she responds primly, saying: ]

Honestly, why are you so hung up on what form I take? It's not like you've ever actually seen my real face. Would you really feel that much better if I looked like I did before?

[ Which is, all right, disingenuous, a bit - after all, how she looked earlier is quite a bit closer to her actual appearance than this is. Still, she wants to needle her. Quite a lot, actually. ]

$nastygram: (C:\dontdothatthen)$

From:

nastygram

Um, [Darlene says, with a laugh--] you are so not making me want to tell you dick.

[The truth of it is, hell yes Darlene would feel better if Kitty looked the way she did before. First of all, because she wouldn't have to talk to a cat in a park like a goddamn Disney princess.

Second, because it is not fair to wear masks when she doesn't get a mask. Anon is fine, but then everyone should get to be anon. Kitty would still call her Darla, if anyone asked; Darlene has been careful as fuck not to attach her real name to her face. But she could still pick her out in a line-up, describe her to a sketch artist; she could still find Darlene, and that is shit.

And now she's learned that the face Kitty wore before wasn't her own face at all. How does that make her feel? Like a little sick. And also really pissed.]

I spill my guts and I don't even know what you look like? Fuck off.

From:

rathercommon

D'you want to know what I really look like?

[ Her tail lashes once, twice, her pupils wide, her posture tense. ]

I can show you. If you tell me what you were doing.

$nastygram: (C:\derf)$

From:

nastygram

Okay, and how'm I gonna know you're not just screwing around on me again?

[She raises her eyebrows over the tops of her sunglasses.]

Impasse, bitch.

From:

rathercommon

[ Simply: ]

You'll know.

$nastygram: (C:\FOO?)$

From:

nastygram

Wow, how cool and cryptic. UGH--

[Which is a word Darlene actually says aloud. She stomps her heel against the pavement, rolls her head back on her shoulders so she can stare up at the sky, like this is all just tooooo much. And she stays like that for a second.

Then she expels a big huge breath and stands more normally, arms folded over her chest.]

Okay. Go. Do your thing, weirdo.

From:

rathercommon

[ This is a bad idea, Kitty thinks to herself. She'll make fun of you. But so bloody what? Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that, right?

Her tail lashes back and forth a few times, hard. And then the cat takes a breath, and then there's a little breath of magic that passes through the air.

And then, standing in the cat's place, is an old woman. She's recognizably Kitty Jones if you squint a bit: the bones of her face are the same, the brightness of her eyes, the thick eyebrows. But her hair is white and her face wrinkled and age-spotted, her lips thin with age. And she's frail, too. She's thin, and weak-looking, and her back is hunched, and her age-gnarled hands shake just a little.

Her eyebrows lift; her voice twists with irony. It's still that same girlish voice. ]

There. Cool, right?

$nastygram: (C:\handwave)$

From:

nastygram

[Darlene doesn't immediately make fun of Kitty. Probably a good start. She does stare because--]

What the fuck.

[And she does laugh.]

Oh my god, you're so old.

From:

rathercommon

{ She looks away. Flatly, she responds: ]

I'm twenty, actually.

[ Then she takes a deep breath, almost physically steeling herself. ]

So there you've got it. So you owe me the truth.

$nastygram: (C:\smop)$

From:

nastygram

Whatever you say, grandma.

[There is probably more to this. It's probably some bullshit. Darlene is still going to take these next few moments to be mean because Kitty fucked with her and it feels good to be vindictive.

She gives her another once over and then shoves her sunglasses up onto her forehead. This part of the park is shady. It's way easier to see without dark glasses.]

Okay, wait, but why don't you use this all the time? I mean, shit. Old ladies can get away with anything. No one tells them off. And if they do, it's like, oh, they could die at any time, you're a goddamn monster. This is bulletproof.

From:

rathercommon

[ Her lips thin even further, and she looks back at Darlene. Her eyes are fierce and dark and alert and intent - no question that those are the eyes of a young woman. A young woman with zero chill. ]

Because I'd sooner bloody die than have someone be sweet and gentle to me 'cause they think I'm fragile. Obviously.